So most of you already know that this blog is a joint enterprise, between myself and Wes (aka Daddy) but realistically I have more time to do this than he does (because I’m gobbier, clearly) so when Frenchie Mummy came up with the brilliant #TheDaddyTag Challenge, I had to rope Wes in and get him to pull his finger out on the blog front. I mean, how hard can it be to answer some questions right?
So, I’m being a lazy blogger today – you can all get to know Wes a little bit more (until I’m nominated for the Mummy Tag Challenge, so you’ll be waiting a while there!)
Are you a Stay at Home Daddy or a Working Daddy?
I’m a working Daddy. The money is needed in our family if we want to provide Mason (aka Short Rib) with the life he deserves, but working was always the plan regardless.
Would you have it any other way?
I mean, sure. If we came into a lot of money then we’d stop working. At least the kind of working we do now. Instead I’d start my own company and work hard at that, but with fewer hours so more time to spend with Amy and Short Rib. If I could change something about it now, without pipe dreams of lottery wins, it’d be about those working hours. My current position was very nearly 4 x 10 hour days with 3 off but instead ended up a usual 5 day week. Not the end of the world, but if both Amy and I could work 4 days I think we’d dive at that chance and wrestle it into submission.
Do you co-change dirty nappies?
Even the very smelly ones? Hmm, I’d love to lie about this and take equal credit but, sadly, Amy will likely read this… she does more than I do on this front. Not to say I don’t do any – I do, even the dirty ones – and sometimes we tag team when he’s being a real wriggly ferret.
A little fairy gives you the possibility of breastfeeding? Are you going for it or do you run away?
If that fairy gave the ability to all Dads, and Short Rib didn’t end up the only kid in school who sucked on Daddy’s B cups, then yeah I’d go for it. No reason it should be left to the mum’s.
What is the one must-have item for a daddy?
A video baby monitor. I have a nephew who’s a similar age to Short Rib and his noises have them running up and down the stairs to make sure he’s OK / to comfort him. With the video it’s much easier to see if a) it’s actually him, b) it’s something likely to last longer than a few seconds and c) IS HE ALIVE??. Yeah it’s extreme, but with your first, your precious, these thoughts genuinely cross your mind. You worry about whimpering, fast breathing, slow breathing, restlessness, crying, screaming but then… silence. Silence is the worst. Our monitor even does temperature readings, 2 way comms, lullabys, support multiple cameras and still has the traditional noise indicators for when video isn’t on (to save battery if not plugged in). I’m not a salesman, I just genuinely appreciated having this tool at our disposal.
Couple of honourable mentions though, because I’m not good at following the question rules: A decent camera. My phone has taken some good ones, but the best ones are from our DSLR. If you can afford one, do yourself the favour. You’ll enjoy them later in your child’s life. My final mention is a baby carrier, so handy to not have to push a pram around a busy shop / town centre. Used mine loads until he was about 9 months.
How many kids do you plan on having?
Oh, I don’t know. Before we had 1, we said 2. Now we’ve been hit with the reality of childcare costs and our dream of a little female Rib became a little less feasible. At least at this stage in our lives. Maybe we’ll still have another, but it won’t be until number 1 is in school, and even then we’re not sure if we want such a gap, or to start forking out so many hundreds per month on top of how much his school activities will then cost. It’s something we’ll likely muse about and debate for a few years yet.
Lads’ nights? How often do you have them?
Meh, never. Not my thing anymore, they stopped in my mid-twenties, long before little ‘un swam his way into existence.
Your child’s favourite achievement?
His independence. Long before the norm, and before he ‘should’, he’s been insisting on doing things himself. Only basic things (he’s only just turned one, you see) like feeding himself with his own spoon, holding his own bottles, standing up. Proud of him. He’s also started walking, attempting to say words etc. But they’re all standard stuff.
What is your best memory with your kid?
His first holiday.
We only took him to Spain, for one week all inclusive, to see how he’s get on with the weather/food/disruption to sleeping patterns and stuff. He took it in his stride, better than we did in fact. Got himself a little tan (that doesn’t ever seem to have left him), ate the buffet out of house and home each day, loved life around the pool but not so much in it – it was freezing water. We took him on some days out and he just savoured every bit, even at 8 months old. All whilst getting some new teeth through as well. He’s a bloody trooper.
(This is a snap from said holiday. Awww <3)
Name one thing you miss since being a daddy?
There’s not much to be honest, he’s made life much better for me! But there have been a few things recently that we’ve wanted to do, from going to the cinema to some of our favourite bands playing gigs, stand up comedy shows to game/film/comic conventions. Just little days / evenings out that he can’t attend, which means we can’t. We watch other people get regular childcare thrown at them and it’s hard sometimes, knowing that in the year he’s been alive we don’t even need to use a full hand to count the times we’ve had to ourselves. I can’t complain, I miss him when he’s not around, and I wouldn’t ever want to leave him ‘often’, but sometimes sure would be nice.
Weight gain, before pregnancy, during, after and now? And we mean YOU DADDY, not the mummy!
Well, weight is an emotional and physical rollercoaster for me even without taking the pregnancy or aftermath into account. I guess roughly it goes something like this though… Lost loads of weight a couple years before his arrival (7 stone, roughly), put it all back on slowly up to the point of birth but unrelated to it. Since then I’ve tried to lose weight and blamed stuff like not having the time to go to the gym for it not happening. In reality, my head just wasn’t ‘in the zone’. Now I’m finally coming round to having the correct mind-set. No gym is needed really, it’s mostly diet and that’s where I intend to start.
Dream holiday with your kids?
Disney World, Florida. This was my dream holiday anyway, having done it 5 times and still not bored of it. There’s so much there for adults that people just don’t realise. It’s not all kids rides and characters. There’s some amazing restaurants, nightlife, educational attractions, thrill rides, walks, shopping, shows, beaches, water sports, fireworks displays, new technologies, gigs, sporting events, fancy hotels and so on. Of course, it’s also ‘ the most magical place on earth’ for children, so it’s a win-win. I know Short Rib will absolutely love it.
Dream holiday without your kids or even without the other half? (You’re allowed to dream)
Genuinely wouldn’t ever go away without Amy. Maybe I just haven’t encountered it ‘yet’, but after 5 years I’ve not had the urge to be away from her. Not once. I guess because we do have alone time, we just happen to be near each other. But we’re comfortable doing separate things, not talking if we don’t need to, but still being in each other’s company. So, dream holiday together. Hmm, I think I’d like to do Japan, probably Tokyo, but if I had the spare cash to book something for us I think I’d go with a Scandinavian cruise, including a few nights stay in Finland to take in the scenery and Aurora Borealis. Maybe a spot of whale watching. I know Amy would love it, and that’s the most important thing in my eyes.
How has your life changed since having kids?
If only I remembered what it was like before, then I’d be able to answer. Seriously, from the moment we brought him home life’s not been the same. WE’VE been the same, but every day has been something new. I guess the difference is that before the Rib, everything was about us. After the Rib, we’re secondary to him. The most easily describable changes are: Earlier nights, earlier mornings, more time outside, more children’s TV, more tidying up, less clean clothes & more smiles all around.
Finish the sentence “It makes my heart melt when…”
I shout at Short Rib (usually for trying to take coal out of the fireplace) and he buries his head in the floor with the saddest looking eyes I’ve ever seen.
Favourite beers brands and football team?
Coors Light, or my local brewery Spitting Feathers. Their Thirstquencher is pretty damn good. Not even slightly interested in Football.
Huggies or Pampers?
Are Huggies still a thing? Thought they went out of business and Sainsbury’s now uses their old manufacturing plant? Of course, I could be completely wrong. Still, I’d go with Pampers; we got some free stuff off them during the pregnancy and I’m clearly easily bought.
Have you always wanted kids?
Yeah I think so. I never wanted them ‘in the now’ until I was with Amy, but I always knew I’d like some eventually.
Best part of being a dad?
Having someone I can see so much potential in. He’s already a better version of me. He’s handsome and (crudely at this stage) highly intelligent. I’m never going to force him into doing stuff, he can choose what he enjoys, but I know he’ll be awesome at something, if not most things. Yes, I’m likely being a biased dad, but I guess that’s what my answer is. To me, he’s the best person who ever lived and I would and will do anything for him. That’s an amazing feeling. My own personal Wonderboy who’ll soon be able to bring me drinks and cheese on a stick whenever I want it. Woop!
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